Dr. Lant passed away April 16, 2023
Not in the mood for Thanksgiving? Then be grateful for what you don’t have!
http://jeffreylantarticles.com/jeffreylant/not-in-the-mood-for-thanksgiving-then-be-grateful-for-what-you-dont-have/
D:\Business with Dr. Lant\Thanksgiving_turkey_dinner.png
by Dr. Jeffrey Lant
Author’s program note. Rarely if ever have I seen my fellow countrymen so riled up… irritable, angry, rude epithets at the ready, bad behaviors endemic. What’s going on? Try these for openers…
A rotten economic situation that just won’t get better… and you’re afraid it never will. And so you worry (for the umpteenth time) about just how secure your job is. Is there some guy in Mumbai who’ll be glad to do it at half what you get? You’ve raised the subject with your boss… but his answer was not reassuring and now he won’t look you in the eye.
A president whose leadership style gives us no leadership… and nary a Republican presidential candidate who doesn’t cause multitudes to hold their noses, gagging, and wonder why our mind boggling lengthy and expensive campaign produces candidates we can’t stand or respect, much less admire.
Sickening scandals like the one still unfolding at Penn State, scandals that make us wake up in the middle of the night shouting, “What the…… is going on around here?”. Sometimes we wonder, and not just once either, whether anyone is honest, decent, and unarmed anymore… or whether it’s only suckers (you being one) who play by the rules.
Every day we pick up the newspaper and read about another murder in the neighborhood, our neighborhood. Are our neighbors only “good” because we don’t know their secret lives and the home truths that haven’t yet been disclosed?
We read about some drug bust at the school down the street… and are horrified to see the police photo and recognize our kid’s favorite teacher. We run upstairs and check the closet and dresser drawer to see if this has touched us even closer. You’re fortunate today… nothing out of order… but the word “yet” comes immediately to mind… since these days you expect something bad to happen any time now and aren’t particularly surprised when it does.
We read about… and are as concerned as our busy lives will allow… another species declared extinct… another Web sex scandal… another political official with a skill for theft and plausible denial. You feel sure he’ll get off easy when his time in court comes up. Is that what the bandage over the eyes of the statue of Justice is supposed to mean?
You’re concerned about America’s unending wars in countries whose names you cannot pronounce, much less find on a map, but which you are paying for. You’ve got a friend whose young cousin, proud and handsome in his Marine Corps uniform, was killed by a sniper… a boy just 20 years old.
The thought haunts you all day… You want to believe such early death helps the country in question, America, the world… but you don’t. You see that boy’s eyes and feel them boring into you, asking one question over and over — “Why?”… and you just can’t give a good answer. You feel increasingly helpless as the barrage of bad news, miseries, muddles, mayhem just won’t quit. You want time off from it all… but these realities, details delivered to us faster than ever compliments of the Web, constitute the unceasing rhythm of our lives.
And this is only the tip of the iceberg.
We wonder if, after a lifetime of contributing, Social Security will be there when we need it… and whether Medicare will provide the level of service we’ll need. A gal from our office had that acute breathing problem and was put on a respirator; the hospital didn’t want to pay for it… and the matter now resides in their legal department. We want care… we get lawyers. It makes us very, very nervous…. and sad.
We wonder how some shady Greek and Italian politicians can have so much influence on our lives so far away. What kind of magic powers have they got that force us (however superficially) to pay attention to what they’re doing… and doing… and doing, all of which threatens the stability and satisfaction of our lives? You want to say it’s “unfair”… but you know no one cares what you think about the matter… and you don’t want people to think you’re a wimp. So you stay quiet and unsatisfied… it’s just the way things are. And so the days pass…
… until the calendar tells you it’s Thanksgiving, the official day, sanctioned by custom and dictated by law, you get together with family and friends to eat too much and give thanks for your ability to do so. But this year, you just don’t feel like it, though you wouldn’t mind a piece or two of pumpkin pie. What’s a body to do?
I’ll share something that works for me… don’t waste your time enumerating all the good things you’ve got, especially when you realize most of them are flawed and superficial. Instead, focus on the myriad of problems, inconveniences, woeful situations and debilitating malevolence you don’t have… bullets you have dodged for another year. This will make you feel really thankful about things that really matter. Here’s how it works…
Preparation and The List
This year I attend my 64th Thanksgiving, so I consider myself a man with some experience in the matter. Put this experience to work by putting aside the usual falderals… don’t just hold hands and ask little Janie to say the blessing. Janie is probably too young to have much insight into the event… and will be unable to perform her helping role to perfection. Thus the end result will be unutterably banal, like all the years before.
Instead, seize this bull by the horns and brainstorm a long list of things you are thankful you don’t have to do, think about, or consider in any way. Be brutally frank.
Item: your boss got fired because of that restroom peccadillo, and you never have to see him again. That was huge!
Item: your estranged cousin Herbie, bete noir of many years, has gone missing, no one knows where. If he never returns, that would be too soon.
Item: Your darling daughter didn’t marry the wild idealist who always played the zither and never bathed. Delicious.
Item: your neighbor’s noisome pooch Mickey, gifted with a piecing yelp and high decibel duration, ran away in pursuit of amorous freedom. He will of course be missed by someone… but not by you.
Keep going! Don’t stint! As you get into the task, you see that the things you don’t have, that you were afraid you would have and forever are the very things you always needed to make this holiday sing.
Now type your list. You will never remember them all and since each adds its mite to the happy event, do not rely on memory. Practice, too, reciting them. Read slowly…. with deliberate cadence and gravitas in your voice.
Having recited this list you will feel, perhaps for the first time in months, truly happy for you have discovered for yourself and shown the world the ample bounty of happiness at your fingertips, Thanksgiving now and forever your favorite holiday.
** Your response to this article is requested. What do you think?
Let us know by posting your comments below.
D:\Business with Dr. Lant\Happy_Thanksgiving.png
My most memorable Thanksgiving… and oh the memories!
by Dr. Jeffrey Lant
Author’s program note. Quick can you name your favorite Thanksgiving song? Unless it’s “Over the river and through the woods” (1844), you probably don’t have one. But I do. It’s called “Turkey in the straw”, and it is a traditional American folk song from the 1820s. And though strictly speaking it was not written for Thanksgiving, you’ll have to forego its strict history in favor of the elastic meaning I shall give the tune and its use. I am sure, in due time, you will forgive me. In any event, start by going to any search engine, find the tune, and put on your dancing shoes… because this Thanksgiving you’ll be dancing, not just filling out your embonpoint, and belching.
What my family usually did for Thanksgiving… celebrated, sanctified, dull.
I was brought up in an Illinois family which, like all our neighbors, believed in the verities of God, country, and family. These were the bedrocks on which we built our homes, our communities and our nation. And these three essential parts of American life came sharply together at Thanksgiving, an event which had to be arranged and celebrated in the grand manner… best china, best crystal, best silver and food that was quite simply awesome, no stinting contemplated, allowed, or accepted. We were Americans, part of the great heartland of the nation, and if we didn’t have much to be thankful for, then who did?
Still, this holiday (and Christmas, too) always raised the issue of where to celebrate, for we were part of large extended families with matriarchs in various branches who made it clear their feelings would be hurt if we didn’t grace their Thanksgiving Day tables, though why they wanted my sister with her tendency to scream while eating (admittedly she was only in pre-school) and my brother (but that is another story), I as eldest son and eldest grandson (on both sides) could never understand. I knew why they wanted me… “let me count the ways….”
The solution to this problem of venue was solved in most years by the simple expedient of appearing at two (or even more) holiday tables groaning under the weight of families who had done well… and stuffing ourselves to sickness accordingly. It is no wonder they felt queasy by day’s end. Personally I always saved room (if at all possible) for the desserts… for here amidst so many culinary achievements… was sweet perfection in so many alluring ways. Pies of every kind (pumpkin de rigueur of course), cobblers, cookies with holiday themes… strudel (we were of Germanic stock and proud)… and the cakes… but enough. Suffice it to say there was no thought of mere sufficiency. It was all about excess… in so many ways so that no one could ever say anything else, or even suggest it.
Time — and holiday arrangements — marches on.
Sadly, over time things changed and my father and mother were significant reasons why the multi-mealed Thanksgiving came to an end. Specifically, we moved from Illinois when I was just 16 to California, where family (as Charles Manson and hippies from Haight-Ashbury proved) had an altogether different meaning. And so, unless my father decided (and my mother concurred), for father’s sister and his wife did not love each other, unless, that is, we were going to our Carter cousins’ ranch in Bakersfield, we stayed home… and invited people we liked, who were never related. In short, we went from the traditional Thanksgiving of too much of this, too much of that, people we “had” to like because we were related, to Thanksgivings we invented… and, as we discovered later when sociologists explored American migrations, most other people were doing the same thing. And that’s why my mother, Shirley de Lauing Lant Phelps de Barlais y de Kesoun, and I were in the port of San Pedro, California en route to Baja California for Thanksgiving, 1985.
Fourth book, second Thanksgiving out of America.
I have always been of an industrious nature and my breakneck pace through 1985 made clear that I was a man on a mission, going places, meeting people. I had my fourth book underway, a publishing company to oversee, an international consulting business, a multitude of lectures nationwide, and a nationally syndicated program on the Business Radio Network. Managing time was of the essence.. and this precluded vacations and other ways of wasting time, including voyaging to a part of the world in which I had absolutely no interest. But, then, my mother did… and she was a very formidable woman. She named the destination, I ponied up for the tickets, and so we boarded one of the floating restaurants and bars they call cruise ships, where eating and lassitude are the order of the day, every day.
We were booked as Dr. and Mrs. Lant, which while absolutely accurate was also the seed for a memorable (and oh so wrong) deduction… because, you see, on this ship, as on all such vessels, the ladies of a certain age always out number the gents… and so the hopefulness which always accompanies these ladies on board always quickly wilts.
My mother was a stylish and youthful looking woman and made a point of so appearing, to best advantage. I was, as usual, slovenly, a demolisher of clothes, even those from the best shops in Boston and England. Still, as Agatha Christie once observed, old clothes properly cut are always suitable attire for a gentleman. My mother strenuously disagreed, but here her jeremiads fell on deaf ears.
Still…one memorable evening, a woman of the purple-haired ilk sidled up to POM (Poor Old Mother) and asked how long we’d been married… and how she’d managed it; (no doubt wanting instructions on how to secure as willing mate one as young, winsome, and obviously God-favored as I.) Freud must have had a conniption.
And that was just the beginning of the memorable holiday voyage.
My mother and I worked as a team; she was admiral, I cadet. The moment after we arrived on board, she took a page of her cream colored stationary as Baroness de Barlais y de Kesoun, gold coronet ablaze at the top, and sent a charming message (of which she was past mistress) to the Captain, advising him a celebrated author was on board whom she’d like to present. That “celebrated author” would have been me. That note she delivered post haste to the purser along with a First Edition of my book “Our Harvard,” suitably autographed by that self-same author. She always traveled with a few copies…
The next day I sat in a deck chair, enveloped in a plaid blanket, hands chilled, writing the current book, “The Unabashed Self-Promoter’s Guide: What every man, woman, child and organization in America needs to know about getting ahead by exploiting the media.” For all that I had to be thawed out each evening, I was making lickety-split progress… and could still dance attendance on Her Ladyship, my mother. It was a model that worked…
The Captain requests…
In due course, of course, the Captain responded… not just with an invitation to the table at dinner where he held court but to cocktails in his luxurious private quarters. We dressed accordingly; (my Harvard blazer was wrinkled but its insignia buttons were solid gold.) When we discovered he was Greek, we should have recalled the old maxim “Beware of Greeks bearing gifts…”
He was a man of charm, information, and what we Midwesterners call schmaltz. As such he was very good company, paying every courtesy to the Double B (as we termed the double Baroness, in her own right, too). But there was something not quite right… which became instantly apparent when, in paying my mother an exaggerated farewell he tickled the inside of my hand, in a manner which could not possibly have been misconstrued. I meant to tell her… she would have roared with laugher and indignation. Which brings us to our unique Thanksgiving on the high seas.
On board, one ate and participated in activities which could never quite obscure their purpose: to let air out of bloated stomachs. One of these activities was the time-honored “talent show” which would have been anything but… except for POM. She had an idea to sweep the boards… she always did… and with her vision, energy, imagination and unparalleled ability to shame people into doing things, she generally succeeded. “The First Thanksgiving”.
POM dragooned one passenger after another into taking part in what was certain to be the winning entry: a sure-to-please musical rendition of the first Thanksgiving, with dialog by me and direction by… but you can guess who. Despite frequent (ever escalating) reminders that the script needed to be written, yours truly did not write the script; instead falling victim to Demon Rum… and so when POM came to get me for dress rehearsal (a bare hour before the opening curtain) she found her boy drunk as the lord he was. No script. No excuse. No hope.
But still the show went on, though I had to ad-lib every word, including musical cues to the band, which gamely played our game. Pilgrims said the silly things they would say… Indians (face-paint perfect) acted aboriginal… and “Turkey in the straw” rang out frequently as passenger Pilgrims and Indians ran about the stage capturing passenger turkeys. Then le tout ensemble sang “God Bless America”. Of course we were cheered to the echo, and I got the kind of hugs and kudos I expected… and she had deserved.
My Thanksgiving this year will be dull indeed without her… for she is making friends and raising cane in a better place, where she will know, for certain, I would write this article and remember….
* What are your favourite Thanksgiving memories? Let us know by posting your comments below.
* * * * *
About The Author
Harvard-educated Dr. Jeffrey Lant is CEO of Worldprofit, Inc., where small and home-based businesses learn how to profit online. Dr. Lant is also a syndicated writer and author of 18 best-selling business books
Stop! Before you eat that turkey drumstick, either dark or light as of your choosing, listen to this Thanksgiving Classic article by Dr. Jeffrey Lant with a special appeal to those with a concern for animal rights at: https://youtu.be/yA1VIfuqxT8
“Thanksgiving from the turkey’s perspective. Over the river and through the woods, a nation’s fowl behavior is noted, bemoaned, admonished, challenged.Timely commentary from the cutting edge”
See the full article with another reading by Dr.Jeffrey Lant at:
http://writerssecrets.com/2015/11/14/thanksgiving-from-the-turkeys-perspective-over-the-river-and-through-the-woods-a-nations-fowl-behavior-is-noted-bemoaned-admonished-challenged-timely-commentary-from-the-cutting/
What would happen if the beautiful wild turkeys stood up and banded together, for they had had enough of the degradation of their species. To find out tune in or read the article at: http://writerssecrets.com/2015/11/14/thanksgiving-from-the-turkeys-perspective-over-the-river-and-through-the-woods-a-nations-fowl-behavior-is-noted-bemoaned-admonished-challenged-timely-commentary-from-the-cutting/
This is only one article of the thousands that Dr. Jeffrey Lant, an award winning, internationally renowned, best selling author, has written and has made available to members at www.WritersSecrets.com – http://writerssecrets.com where he brings the crucial features of his very successful writing career to help others master the art of writing.
This exquisite online writing course has live, weekly, interactive sessions with Dr. Lant using these articles and his award winning memoir “A Connoisseur’s Journey: Being the artful memoirs of a man of wit, discernment, pluck, and joy” available at: http://writerssecrets.com/2015/11/13/a-connoisseurs-journey-being-the-artful-memoirs-of-a-man-of-wit-discernment-pluck-and-joy/ are uses as models along with tips and insights from Dr. Lant and Guest authors and experts from the field all recorded for future reference.
Join Dr. Jeffrey Lant and www.WritersSecrets.com at: http://writerssecrets.com where secrets and insights are revealed to master the art of writing.
http://writerssecrets.com/discover-writers-secrets-with-internationally-renowned-best-selling-author-dr-jeffrey-lant/article-archive/
WritersSecrets.com presents a special Thanksgiving reading with Dr. Jeffrey Lant and his article “My most memorable Thanksgiving… and oh the memories!”
Breaking from tradition brings about one of Dr. Lants most memorable thanksgivings and he shares those memories in a most exquisite way.
You can read along for the article is posted at: http://writerssecrets.com/discover-writers-secrets-with-internationally-renowned-best-selling-author-dr-jeffrey-lant/article-archive/
Where you will find more articles like this.
While you’re there check out the Writers Secrets, An extraordinary online writer’s course of exquisite quality. Not just on writing but communicating, how to use words to move people, motivate, broaden horizons, build bridges and bring people together.
Get a year of Writers Secrets and Insights at http://writerssecrets.com
WritersSecrets.com presents a special Thanksgiving reading with Dr. Jeffrey Lant and his article “My most memorable Thanksgiving… and oh the memories!”
Breaking from tradition brings about one of Dr. Lants most memorable thanksgivings and he shares those memories in a most exquisite way.
You can read along for the article is posted at: http://writerssecrets.com/discover-writers-secrets-with-internationally-renowned-best-selling-author-dr-jeffrey-lant/article-archive/
Also you will find more articles like this.
While you’re there check out the Writers Secrets, an extraordinary online writer’s course of exquisite quality. Not just on writing but communicating, how to use words to move people, motivate, broaden horizons, build bridges and bring people together.
Get a year of Writers Secrets and Insights at http://writerssecrets.com
WritersSecrets.com presents a special Thanksgiving reading with Dr. Jeffrey Lant and his article “Not in the mood for Thanksgiving? Then be grateful for what you don’t have!”
So if you are really not in the mood for being grateful this may help if you turn your mind to things you are thankful you don’t have!
You can read along for the article is posted at: http://writerssecrets.com/discover-writers-secrets-with-internationally-renowned-best-selling-author-dr-jeffrey-lant/article-archive/
Also you will find more articles like this.
While you’re there check out the Writers Secrets, an extraordinary online writer’s course of exquisite quality. Not just on writing but communicating, how to use words to move people, motivate, broaden horizons, build bridges and bring people together.
Get a year of Writers Secrets and Insights at http://writerssecrets.com
WritersSecrets.com presents a special Thanksgiving reading with Dr. Jeffrey Lant and his article “Not in the mood for Thanksgiving? Then be grateful for what you don’t have!”
If that’s you then tune.
Dr. Lant shows how looking at the things you don’t have may well bring a bit of happiness along with some gratitude.
Go to: http://writerssecrets.com/discover-writers-secrets-with-internationally-renowned-best-selling-author-dr-jeffrey-lant/article-archive/
To read the article along with Dr. Lant.
You will also find more articles like this for your reading pleasure.
While you’re there check out Writers Secrets.
An extraordinary online writer’s course of exquisite quality.
Not just on writing but communicating, how to use words to move people, motivate, broaden horizons, build bridges and bring people together.
Get a year of Writers Secrets and Insights at: http://writerssecrets.com
In Writers Secrets, this is what Dr. Lant is prepared to give to you:
Writing tips for each week. These tips are short, sweet, and proven to improve your writing.
Guests of the week. The conversations that follow are designed to help you improve your writing and are guaranteed to be fast-moving, clever, and packed with useful material.
Critiques of student writings. The discussion will be honest, direct, and positive.
Readings from Dr. Lant’s works and those of guests and experts.
Here’s an outline of just SOME of what you get with Writers Secrets Course. You must master each part to succeed as a writer.
1) How to begin successfully.
2) A room of your own.
3) No interruptions!
4) Prepare tonight to get started in the morning.
5) How music can put you in the mod.
6) Setting a quota — and achieving it.
7) Writing when you feel like it. Writing when you don’t.
8) Gathering your facts. Knowing which to use; which not.
9) Kill the telephone and all related interruptions.
10) Write. Save. Rewrite.
11) A quick lesson on words.
12) Never force your writing.
13) Start your day by editing what you wrote yesterday.
14) Need oxygen? Dance!
15) Creating punchy titles.
16) How to write a knock-out opening paragraph.
17) Knowing and using the right word.
18) Are you writing the truth?
19) Take a break: brainstorm future article subjects.
20) How to use music.
21) The dictionary is your friend.
22) Wikipedia. How to use it.
23) On adjectives.
24) The importance of convenient line length.
25) Fact first. Getting them. Arranging them. Using them.
26) Writing about Mother.
27) Writing about other family members and friends.
28) Writing about pets.
29) Benefiting from my memoirs, “A Connoisseur’s Journey.”
30) Becoming the emotion meister.
31) Writing reports.
32) Writing commentary.
33) Writing elegies.
34) Reviewing your bad habits. If you don’t write regularly, you cannot improve.
35) Research gives your writing heft and teeth.
36) How to organize family history before writing.
37) Writing testimonials and remembrances.
38) Reading your words for maximum impact.
39) How to make characters you create real.
40) How to use “Writer’s Market.”
41) How to write cover letters that sell your articles.
42) How to get civic recognition, prizes and awards for what you write.
43) Plagiarism and Fair Use.
44) Protecting what you write.
45) Internet publication resources.
46) Presentation copies and how to give them.
47) Think and act like a literary star before you are.
48) How to deal with criticism.
49) Read other authors… then read some more. Make it a point to read more than you write.
50) Thanking the people who helped you… ahem!
And more, more, more.
As often as possible individual student works will be discussed in class, particularly if what has been submitted indicates a significant problem!
And this all happens, hey presto, in this course where your interests are prime… and what you pay each day is less than a piece of gum with rewards that could be astronomical.
Go to http://writerssecrets.com
Follow us on Facebook at: http://www.facebook.com/WritersSecrets
most memorable Thqanksgiving https://youtu.be/C-p3aSArtFw
About the Author
This is only one article of the thousands that Dr. Jeffrey Lant, an award winning, internationally renowned, best selling author, has written and has made available to members at www.WritersSecrets.com – http://writerssecrets.com
At Writers Secrets.com he brings the crucial features of his very successful writing career to help others master the art of writing.
This exquisite online writing course has live, weekly, interactive sessions with Dr. Lant using these articles and his award winning memoir
“A Connoisseur’s Journey: Being the artful memoirs of a man of wit, discernment, pluck, and joy” available at: http://writerssecrets.com/2015/11/13/a-connoisseurs-journey-being-the-artful-memoirs-of-a-man-of-wit-discernment-pluck-and-joy/
They are used as models in Writers Secrets course along with tips and insights from Dr. Lant, Guest Authors and Experts from the field with all lessons recorded for members of www.WritersSecrets.com future reference.
=========================
It was a great honor to work with Dr. Jeffrey Lant during his tenure as CEO of Worldprofit. This
article was given to Daniel Fischer while Dr. Jeffrey Lant was at Worldprofit.
Yours In Success,
Daniel Fischer Dano Enterprises
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